Valentines...

I meant to write this post the day before Valentines Day. I didn't make it.  We had a nice little holiday.  Ben got me a dozen pink roses, a box of my favorite candy, a cookie cake, and two cards, one of which plays a Chicago classic.  We have reached that age where we embarass our kids for kicks and they fall for it every time---SHEER GREATNESS!!  All we have to do is kiss or do some of our 1980's dance moves and Bobby covers his eyes and screams "happy place, happy place."  It's cheap entertainment!  We also took the kids out to eat the traditional Valentines meal of pancakes.  Yes it is.  Check your tradition manual.   In the whole Valentine vein I keep going back to the 43rd chapter of Isaiah which says: But now, this is what the Lord says--- he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; You are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, Your Savior; I give Egypt for your ransom, Cush and Seba in your stead. Since you are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you, I will give men in exchange for you, and people in exchange for your life. Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your chidren from the east and gather you from the west. I will say to the north, "Give them up!" and to the south, "Do not hold them back." Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth--- everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made. Lead out those who have eyes but are blind, who have hears but are deaf. All the nations gather together and the peoples assemble. Which of them foretold this and proclaimed to us the former things? Let them bring in thier witnesses to prove they were right, so that others may hear and say, "It is true." "You are my witnesses," declares the Lord, "and my servant whom I have chosen, so that you may know and believe me and understand that I am he. Before me no god was formed, nor will there be one after me. and apart from me there is no savior. I have revealed and saved and proclaimed---I, and not some foreign god among you. You are my witnesses, declares the Lord, "that I am God, Yes, and from ancient days I am he. No one can deleiver out of my hand.  When I act, who can reverse it?" I just keep reading that passage (Isaiah 43: 1-13) over and over.  It is my Valentine from the Lord.  I know that He is working for my good and will bring our little Maisy home.  He is unaffected by statistics (thanks for the reminder, Meredith) and I am so blessed to be a witness to His glory and grace.    Oh, I almost forgot---We also watched the movie FIREPROOF for Valentines Day.  I must say it was awesome.  I recommend it to all my friends----married or not.   The CCAA is currently matching babies to parents.  Please join me in praying for 30+ days of referrals in this group.  I believe that God is at work in the halls of the CCAA and across the nation of China.   We are currently in the process of renewing our I-171H for USCIS.  Our first one will expire in May (they are only good for 18 months) and we don't want to miss our free renewal.  We have new background checks, medical checks and references (had to be new ones---so don't feel slighted if we asked you last time you couldn't do it this time!)  We have to have a new home visit as well.  Everything has been mailed and now we're just waiting on stuff to come back so we can file the form with USCIS and get fingerprinted.  For some people this is a hassle but I'm happy to have something to do that is adoption related.   This is LID month 14 for us.  Please continue to pray that we will receive Maisy's referral soon.     And I leave you with this----On Monday, as we were waiting for Bobby to get out of Boy Scouts, Abby kept telling me that "Jesus loves me" I responded "Jesus loves everybody."  Her response?  "Why?"  And truthfully, I don't know.  I cannot comprehend the love that compelled my Savior to die for me on the cross and to absorb my sin.  He paid my debt with his blood because I couldn't pay it.  That is love.   Happy Valentines Day.  May you know True Love.  It will set you free. Amy

The Perfect Gift

I woke up this morning annoyed and determined to vent the reason for said annoyance on this blog.  I was pretty convinced that I was fueled by righteous indignation (not jealousy, frustration, sadness or impatience-----yeah, right).  See, this entire blog was going to be concerned with my feelings regarding those who already have two or three children adopted from China and are currently in the process of adopting another one.  The families that I am aware of (and DO NOT know personally) often have debts left to pay on previous adoptions and are seeking financial assistance to facilitate their current adoption costs.  My initial reaction was "How dare they!  If they cannot afford to pay for their own previous adoption costs what gives them the right to ask others for assistance to adopt another child?  How do they even take care of the children they have?"  HMMMM....besides the obvious factor of this being absolutely NONE OF MY BUSINESS I have to ask myself "What difference does it make to me?"  "Why am I so angry?"   It took some soul searching and I think it comes down to ego and jealousy.  People make choices that I would not make.  That's just a statement of fact.  How other people manage their finances is none of my business.  I can feel superior in my ability to pinch a penny until Lincoln sues for sexual harrassment but that is it.  This then leads to the jealousy ( I knew I said it wasn't a motivating sentiment but, c'mon, I think we all know the truth...)  Because some of the families who have multiple adopted children from China have adopted from the Waiting Child List many of them will have completed an adoption in less time than Ben and I have been in the process---BY A LONG SHOT.  But, hey, the WCL is open to us too.  It's our decision--- and just because we don't choose to go that route right now (we're not saying we would never consider the WCL) does not mean other people aren't choosing the journey that is right and blessed for them.    I'm just weary in the wait.  On the 17th of this month we will have been LID for 14 months.  On my birthday next month we will have been "in the process" for two years.  I'm just feeling all two years of it right now.  Would I change my mind?  No way.  Maisy is in China and we will WAIT FOR GOD TO BRING OUR BABY HOME.   Speaking of birthdays....The kids and I were waiting for Ben in the van outside of the grocery store the other day...just chillin' and listening to KLOVE.  I'm sure I was singing along while Bobby was talking about various and sundry.  Folks, I've gotta be able to multi-task because my darlin' son TALKS ALL THE TIME!!  Anyway, He says "I've decided what to get you for your birthday, Mama.  "Hmmmmm, okay" I reply with not enough enthusiasm I'm sure.  "Can I use your name on the radio?" he asks.  "What?"  My son then tells me that for my b-day he wants to call my favorite Christian radio station and ask everyone to pray on his mama's birthday that God would bring his baby sister home from China.  The baby asked me "Would that be a good present, Mama?"  Once I got a grip and quit sucking snot I told my son that there is no better gift than to know that people are praying for you, especially when those people are your children.  Now wasn't that precious?! And, FYI--If you believe in prayer and would consider lifting my precious Maisy up to the Lord on my birthday---well, it beats a Hallmark card!  March 23rd is the day!   But now I shall write the DENOUMENT (term courtesy of my nerdy English major persona).  Children, regardless of how you get them or who brings them into this world, are a blessing.  The packaging may not always be what we expect or even what we think we want or are entitled to (entitlement, what a hoot) but I assure you, they are gift that can come only from God.  Isn't it interesting that the Messiah could have come as an adult, a warrior, a king---but instead came as a baby.  Isn't it interesting that people get pregnant every day but have no creative license in the baby they deliver.  Isn't it interesting that I got angry over how God was leading someone else in the journey to find their child.  What a gift children are.  It isn't time for our gift to come yet.  But I promise you I won't begrudge anyone else theirs----that's pretty hard to do when you aren't THE GIFT GIVER.   May God grant you the desires of your heart,   Amy Dedicated with love to my son and daughter, Bobby and Abby and in great anticipation to my daughter, Maisy----Wonderful gifts from God.